To round out this first month of the New Year, and before we move into the wonderful “looove” month, let’s hit this last (but certainly not final) part of raising amazing kids.
While taking my daughter to her dance class, I heard a parent tell her child “you suck and you’re stupid” –all this because the child bought her the wrong kind of soda. I cringed and felt my face get HOT when this lady told her own daughter this. Stupid was a word my mother said needed to be excluded from our vocabulary. No one, especially a child’s parent(s), should ever speak such words over their child or any child for that matter.
This lady’s words may have not been harsh to you. But to me, it’s considered the starting point of installing low self-esteem and diminishing self-worth into our kids. “We inherit our parents’ beliefs about ourselves. We grow up internalizing the messages we receive from our parents and peers.” I most certainly won’t make it seem as if my child is perfect. However, there will not be a time when I intentionally make her to feel like crap or even worse –less than. If ever I do, I pray to feel so convicted in my soul that I immediately apologize to my child and right my wrong.
I once dated a guy who asked me how I knew I was beautiful. I mean this dude really said, “Your grades and/or accomplishments show you are smart, but how do you know you’re beautiful?” It was like he was challenging me to look at my self-worth in the form of beauty. I looked him square in the eyes and with a very matter of fact tone said, “It’s how God made me, so I didn’t have a choice in the matter”. I soon learned this guy hated my confidence and could not understand why he could not emotionally or mentally break me. I thank God for a mother and father, who to this day, still tell me “I am God’s chosen creation and I am beautiful” amongst a host of other positive affirmations. Could you imagine what the opposite effect would have had on me?
I personally try my best to remind my little one of two facts no one can ever take away from her: (1) You are God’s child and (2) You are amazing! I make her repeat and scream it back to me:” I AM GOD’S CHILD AND I AM AMAZING!” Yes, I literally make her scream it because I want her just as excited about who she is as I am. If her answers ever dwindle into the negative zone, I ask why she feels this way, while countering each negative ideal with positive reaffirmations. I also let my kiddo know that God designed her to make a great, positive and powerful impact in the world! I remind her, though she is beautiful, it’s minor to the MAJOR person she is now and all she is destined to become!
I challenge you to speak greatness over your child(ren) every day!
Proverbs 18:21 “The tongue can bring death or life…”
Your Restyled Mom…who received a Gift from God and He made her to be #BeautifullyAMAZING!